The Deathbed Conversation That Can Change Everything

Why It's Never Too late to Return to God

Last year I received an email from my sister’s father-in-law, Gary, who told me his sister was dying. She’d been away from church for a long time, but as she neared the end of her life, she had expressed the desire to see a priest. The only problem was, she was afraid and ashamed. She’d made some big mistakes in her life, and now she feared it was too late. She was afraid she couldn’t possibly be forgiven.

Gary was planning to visit his sister, but he didn’t know what to say to her. “How do I convince her that it’s not too late?” he asked me in his email.

Gary’s question scared me. It felt too big, too important. His sister was literally on her deathbed, expressing regret for some of the choices she’d made in her life. She felt ashamed and hopeless, too afraid to confess to a priest. What could I possibly say that would make a difference?

I flipped through my Bible, hoping my eyes would land on the perfect verse. When that failed, I Googled, “What to say to a person on their deathbed,” but none of the search results seemed suitable for this particular situation.

And then I remembered the prodigal son.

The parable tells the story of the younger of two sons, who took his share of the family inheritance early, left home, and then squandered the money on reckless living. Desperate and destitute, the son finally decided to return home to beg his father’s forgiveness. During the long journey home the son rehearsed his confession.

However, when he finally arrived in his neighborhood, but before he made it even halfway up the driveway, his father ran out to greet him with a kiss and an embrace. The rebellious son had his prepared confession ready to go, but before he could utter even a single word, his father welcome him with open arms.

The son was not required to list his sins and make a proper repentance before being allowed back into the fold. Instead, he was instantly received with love, no strings attached. In fact, when the son finally did recite his prepared confession, his father didn’t even acknowledge it. Instead, he commanded his servant to put a ring on his son’s finger, dress him in the finest robe and shoes, and prepare the fattest calf for a welcome-home party.

His beloved son had returned. He had been lost and found, and in the end, that was all that mattered.

In my email to Gary, I urged him to remind his sister about the story of the prodigal son. “Better yet,” I told him, “read the parable aloud to her. The story itself says everything she needs to know about God.” I emphasized to Gary that the verbal confession was actually the least important part of the story. It was the son’s turning around, his return, that led to the father’s rejoicing.

Several months after I sent the email about the prodigal son to Gary, he told me he’d had the opportunity to talk with his sister, and that she had agreed to meet with a priest. “She was frail and scared to death,” Gary said, but she spoke with the priest for over an hour, and at the end of her confession, the priest anointed her and told her she was in a state of grace. Less than one week later, she died a peaceful death at home.

The truth is, none of us is any different from Gary’s sister; we are all prodigal sons and daughters. We make mistakes large and small; we carry regret, shame, and fear; we wonder how God could love us, flawed as we are.

It took Gary’s sister her entire life to return to her father. She made a lot of poor choices and a lot of mistakes along the way. But her past didn’t matter one iota to God. He patiently waited for her all that time; he never gave up on her. And when, in the very last days of her life, she finally turned back to him, he met her, accepted her, and received her with nothing but the deepest love and the most compassionate grace.

Being in relationship with us is God’s deepest joy and desire. That’s what matters most to him. He waits for us with arms wide open, and he rejoices when we fall into his loving embrace, found again.

Weekend One Word: Reviving

Weekend One Word: Reviving

I don’t know if you noticed, but I’d taken a hiatus from the Weekend One Word posts these last few months. Turns out, I kind of missed them. I like to make pretty word-pictures, and focusing on a single word from a single verse each week helps me read Scripture more closely. So…Weekend One Word is back! Most Saturdays I’ll post a verse-picture with a few very brief thoughts. I hope these pictures and posts bring a moment of serenity to your soul.


Based on personal experience, it seems that there is a direct correlation between how well we listen to and heed God’s word and will, and the state of our souls.

When our loyalty is divided between God and the world (James 4:8), we experience unrest in our lives. In trying to appease two masters, we become fragmented and distracted, anxious and weary. We start to hustle for our self-worth; we begin to define our value based on society’s measuring sticks: success, achievement, productivity.

Turns out, God knows what’s best for us; he knows what will bring us rest, security, wholeness, and peace. Only in returning to God and resting in him (Isaiah 30:15) are we able to find our true self, the  unique self created and defined by God, rather than the world.

Only in coming closer to him, in listening and heeding, is our soul replenished and revived.

Some questions for you as you meditate on this verse: 

Are there specific instructions from God that you are ignoring right now?

How is your soul, your innermost self, feeling these days? Anxious and weary or at peace? Does your soul need reviving?


Why It’s Taken 46 Years for Me to Say No

My editor emailed me recently. He had a great opportunity that he'd love for me to consider, he said. I was excited when I read his email, and when I clicked on the link he included for details, my pulse quickened. It looked good, this opportunity. Really good. Without getting into all the nitty … [Read More...]


Be the You God Created

It's good to be back, and thanks so much to all of you who emailed and left warm wishes for healing in the comment box. I couldn't respond (one-handed typing is for the birds!), but know that I appreciated every word! The cast is off, my arm is out of the sling, and the elbow is coming along. I'm … [Read More...]


Hello, Unwelcome Hiatus

After I was home a week or so from Italy, my sister asked, "So, are you going to be one of those people who says, 'Well, in Italy we did this...' and 'The Italians do it this way...'?" I laughed, and then I answered, "Yes, yes, I am going to be one of those people." I was only half … [Read More...]