For close to two decades, I stood in the pew every Sunday morning and coughed at the beginning of the “Nicene Creed” to avoid declaring, “I believe in one God, the Father Almighty.” I couldn’t say those words – “I believe” – aloud, because, in fact, I did not believe. Yet there I was, Sunday after Sunday, reciting empty prayers to a non-existent God.
I did all the right things. I went to confession and did penance, genuflected at the altar, dipped my fingers into holy water and made the sign of the cross and gave up chocolate at Lent. On the outside I played the part of a pretty good Catholic. But on the inside, my heart was stone-cold.
…I’m a guest over at Rachel Held Evan’s place today. Rachel is the author of the memoir Evolving in Monkey Town (I can vouch for how fantastic her book is…I read it) and the upcoming book A Year of Biblical Womanhood. She’s also been an exceedingly generous supporter of my writing, for which I am very grateful! Click over for a glimpse of my journey from non-believer to faith… {thanks for having me, Rachel}
I commented on your guest post:
Michelle,
The more I hear of your journey to faith, the more I appreciate your heart. Your transparency makes your testimony so compelling. It gives a hand hold to those who aren't quite as far along on their journey. And in that, you are bringing Him such Glory, because you are pointing them to Him.
Your question is one I have a hard time answering because the heritage I received from my father was Faith–the kind that knows to the marrow of my being that He Is God and that He Is Sovereign. I am so blessed. That doesn't mean I have never questioned the paths to which He, at times, has set my feet. But, because of all the ways I see Him, working in and through everything, I never doubted He Is God. All the more reason your precious story is so touching to me.
You've peaked my interests. Really like Real people. Thanks.
Just read the story on Rachel's site. Thanks again for the transparency and for leading me to another great blog!