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Michelle DeRusha

Every Day Faith. Faith Every Day.

January 15, 2013 By Michelle

Where to Look When Jesus Goes AWOL

“It doesn’t feel like Christmas down here,” says Rowan, my youngest, as we sit on the wicker couch looking out at the bay. I know what he means. The house we’re staying in for the holidays in Florida doesn’t have a Christmas tree, or lights or stockings or even a fireplace for that matter. We didn’t bring the ceramic nativity that sits on our coffee table at home or our stash of Christmas CDs.

Not only is the decorative accoutrement of Christmas lacking, I’m also missing the everyday spiritual scaffolding that props up my faith. Even though I’d packed my Bible with the best intentions, it sits in the bottom of my suitcase, unopened. On vacation I forego my early morning quiet time and sleep in instead. We skip church and get lazy with dinnertime devotions. I forget to pray. There I am, two days before Christmas, and it feels like Jesus has gone AWOL. Without my routines I feel spiritually unmoored. Christmas feels hollow, empty. Suddenly I don’t trust that I can find God without a host of carefully orchestrated rituals.

…I’m over at Prodigal Magazine today, writing about where to look when it seems like God is missing. Will you join me?

 

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Filed Under: doubt, finding God, God talk: talking to kids about God, parenting, Prodigal Magazine Tagged With: Prodigal Magazine, when it feels like God is missing

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For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a Triple Type A, “make it happen” (my dad’s favorite mantra) striver and achiever (I’m a 3 on the Enneagram, which tells you everything you need to know), but these days my striving looks more like sitting in silence on a park bench, my dog at my feet, as I slowly learn to let go of the false selves that have formed my identity for decades and lean toward uncovering who God created me to be.

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