I settle in, cinch the seat belt across my lap and, with one foot, push my carry-on farther under the seat in front of me. It’s only when I go to power-down my phone that I see I have a text message. And I know, even without looking, who it’s from.
Whether I’m traveling for two days or two weeks, Deidra always sends me a text the morning I depart. It’s a simple message – a wish for safe travels and a good trip. But she always remembers. It’s just one small thing, a few words on my cell phone, but it makes me smile every time. Her text reminds me that I am loved and remembered, that we are connected, she and I.
“Remind me to buy a birthday card for Mary Ann when we’re at CVS,” my mom says as we walk side-by-side past the farm stand and the rows of corn and cabbage along the country road. “No one sends cards anymore, you know,” I tell her. “Well I like them, so I send them,” she replies.
It’s true. My mom never misses a birthday or an anniversary. If you’re in my mom’s address book, you’ll get a card. She single-handedly keeps Hallmark in business. A couple months ago when my dad was in the hospital, my mom forgot to send a birthday card to my Aunt Marie. A week later, Aunt Marie called, wondering what had happened. “Where’s my card? You never forget to send a card!” she told my mom on the phone.
My friend Andrea bakes and cooks – muffins, casseroles, soups, bread, cookies. If you have a baby or a medical procedure, are suffering through the loss of a loved one or a difficult time, it won’t be long before Andrea rings your doorbell, comfort food in hand. My husband Brad’s that way, too. When our neighbor’s Maggie and Mike had a baby, I mused aloud that we should make them a meal. Two hours later, Brad was whipping up a pan of enchiladas in the kitchen.
“No one can do great things,” Mother Teresa once said, “but each of us can do small things with great love.”
Deidra’s texts, my mom’s cards and Andrea’s and Brad’s casseroles remind me just how important these small gestures are. These small acts tell us that we are not alone. That we are remembered, cherished, valued and adored. They may be small gestures, true, but they communicate a great and powerful sentiment: love.
Tell me: What’s one small thing you regularly do with great love?
And the winner of the book Wounded Women of the Bible is: Joanne Palm!!!! Rowan picked your name from the Tupperware bowl!! Joanne, please email me your mailing address and I’ll have the book sent directly to you from Amazon. My email: michellederusha1@gmail.com
LOVE this, Michelle. I don’t know what small things I do, so I’ll share what my husband does. I’m better today than I used to be, but for quite some time, rheumatoid arthritis was so bad that I couldn’t even cut my eggs, much less open anything for several hours in the morning – even the plastic medication dispenser. More than once, I spilled all my pills on the floor in the effort. My husband leaves for work very early in the morning – often before I even get up, but before he does, he opens the little section that holds that day’s morning meds, and puts something for me to eat and drink nearby. It’s a little thing, but it means so much to me and reminds me of his love.
This is so sweet, Patricia – I love your husband, what a man! My husband makes my coffee for me every morning – and he’s a tea drinker himself! Like you said on Facebook, they are little things to the giver, but to the receiver, they make all the difference.
Love this… You are so blessed to have a friend like Deidra in your day-to-day life. She’s pretty amazing. As.Are.You…
Now, our mothers would get along swimmingly. Mama D. has a rather voluminous file of Hallmark cards, and like your mom, rarely forgets to send a card for any occasion. Often, for birthdays, we get two cards: one funny, one serious. And unless our birthday falls on a Sunday, the cards arrive on the exact day of our celebration.
Yes, yes, the file of cards – my mom has that, too! I admit, I have a drawer in my desk with cards stashed away for every occasion. But in this day and age of electronic technology, I rely more and more on Facebook and email. And it’s just not the same. [love that your mom sends both a serious and a funny card for your birthday]
Michelle, this got me thinking about Gary Chapman’s Love Language book. How we all express love in different ways. My husband’s love language is acts of service, so he would be the kind to cook a meal or mow a lawn. My mom’s love language is gifts, so she would know exactly what to send someone to make them feel better. My love language is quality time so the way I would show my care is to call you or sit at your kitchen table and listen to you vent. My friend’s love language is words of affirmation so she has a gift for knowing what to say when you are hurting. while my other girlfriend’s love language is physical touch so she will wrap you in a hug when words fail. God has created us so diverse and it is beautiful to see how we are each suited to show our love in these small ways!
LOVE that book – Deidra loaned it to me! It IS interesting to think of our loved ones and their unique gifts. My friend Sarah’s gift is words of affirmation – she always knows exactly what to say, whether in an email or in person. I just love and appreciate that about her so much.
So your mom and I are the only 2 people to send cards? Lol. I just went to buy a sympathy card for my aunt and uncle. I didn’t like them. So I went for a funny card and wrote a sweet message. Cards and making someone laugh unexpectedly are my things. 🙂
I think that’s a great idea – a funny card with a sweet message to make your aunt and uncle smile when they need it most. And no, you’re not the only card-send in the group — Jennifer Lee’s mom is a card-sender, too (and so is Deidra, come to think of it).
I remember having a conversation with you once about letter writing and the art of sending cards. You are really good at it, Michelle! Jennifer is correct: you are amazing! But not just because you send cards. And, I still think Brad should have a cooking blog. I will be the food taster.
I’m getting lazier and lazier in this world of electronic correspondence, though – I think I need to make a return to letter-writing and card-sending.
And Brad? He made the enchilladas for Mike and Maggie and for you and H in the same week. That guy, I tell ya…
Michelle – I am not sure how your “laziness” has translated into 2013, but I can promise you that you had NO signs of letter writing laziness in 2007. You might (or might not) remember that 2007 was an extremely grievous year for our family but I recall your Christmas card/picture/note as probably the most treasured of the year. You took the time to write something very personal on your year-end letter that was included with the picture of your boys. I treasured that note and re-read it often throughout that year especially. If I really dug around for a while, I bet I could find it as it was not one I would have tossed out!! It might have only taken you a few minutes to pen, but it meant the world to me as I was settling into a far away place with no “comforts of home” and grieving my loss… Many hugs to you for that thoughtful note!! 🙂
Michelle, what a lovely post today! It just confirmed to me the importance of doing those things we once did. I am way too busy & have lost the art of communicating through note, letters, & cards, which I once did! Thankyou for the reminder!
Great post! Makes me wonder what I could do – the little things that might make a difference. I know what it used to be. Maybe it’s time (since retiring) to return to that.
I just received a message via a MP3 file from 95 y/o nursing home friend.. She used to send cards, but due to going blind she now sends voice messages frequently as encouragement.
My farmer husband is always picking & bringing me bouquets of wildflowers from the fields. I think it was yesterday that I posted that picture.
My mother at 91 y/o still sends cards for all birthdays and anniversaries. In fact – it’s the only way my husband and I even remember our anniversary. My mom’s card arrives and we say “Oh!! It’s our anniversary”. You wonder how we could forget?? For some reason we were married during the time that is normally wheat harvest. A hectic time. We just went off and got married.
Thanks for sharing.
How COOL is it that your 95-year-old friend in the nursing home sends MP3 greetings – what a treasure!
Last year right before Valentines Day, I was sending a Valentine’s Day card to my sister. It would have been her 15th anniversary if her husband hadn’t passed away 4 years ago. I got to thinking about other widows in the neighborhood where I grew up and how all those women don’t get Valentines from their husbands anymore and it broke my heart. So I made of list of all my old neighbors, aunts and other loved ones on both sides of our family and sent them all Valentines. NONE of them were expecting it and they all made a fuss and felt remembered and love. it will now be a new tradition in my life.
This is a beautiful gesture and tradition, Michele. Wow, I just love this. Thank you for sharing it here!
What a wonderful Mother, Michelle. She sounds a lot like mine. In addition to all the birthday cards and cards for every holiday known to humankind that she regularly sends to her children, grandchildren, and friends, she has corresponded with pen friends in Russia for nearly 40 years (straight through the tale end of the Cold War) sharing her love and the Gospel. My mother is my inspiration for card-sending and letter-writing. In the world of electronics, there is something very special about getting a handwritten card in the mail (so please know that I really greatly appreciated yours and Deidra’s, which nearly arrived at the same time). We all may be keeping Hallmark in business (and the Post Offic!), and that;s a good thing.
Love
Lynn
I might add that one small thing I did that had incredible ramifications was to send a card of cheer to a reclusive neighbor whom Mike and I met while walking our dog. He always looked dissheveled (the neighbor!), and would barely look up at us. I learned his name and where he lived and jotted him a little note. Lo and behold, he jotted a little note back and was very articulate. Thus began a correspondence with a man and me who lived but a block and a half apart; yet he was far too shy to talk to me. He began sending little gifts to our daughter by post, and a special Christmas present and potted plant when we moved away. He even sent a plant to my husband when Mike had a serious heart attack. My thank-you letter to him was late, and I didn’t hear back for months later. A letter came from a stranger. It was his brother, who explained that my neighbor had had a nervous breakdown many years before, which had left him socially backward. But a small greeting card was a way to open a dialogue with him. I also used to share my women’s and Christmas newsletters with him, and he wrote to tell me it was good to think about God. I’m unsure if he knew the Lord, but it’s my hope that he did. His brother was writing to tell me that he had had a massive stroke and had only survived about a day. I do think that little gestures matter hugely.
Bless you for sharing, Michelle!
Lynn
Oh Lynn, I LOVE this story – it illustrates the essence of community so beautifully. May we all stop and converse with a stranger on the street, just as you did. What a gift you were to him, and he to you.
Thank you for understanding. “Uncle Dave,” as we came to call him was, indeed, a gift to us!
Michelle,
Hi and thank you for this post. I send a psalm via e-mail, 5 days a week to my siblings. My brother recently encouraged me in this, thanking me for my faithfulness. I so appreciate your blog:)
Katie
That’s very cool, Katie – a lovely idea {and thank you for your kind words!}.
My cup of coffee waiting for me every.single.morning by my sweet hubby. It is the little things that make me feel loved. Throw in a hug by an almost-7 -year -old and I’m set for the day.
I’m not sure this is a small thing because to us it was huge.
Our health insurance changed a month before my son was to have surgery. The doctor my son had since he was born, that would be nearly 17 years, was not covered by our plan. Still, this man, Dr. David Lyons of Amherst and Northampton MA, saw us twice and simply waived the fee. He is retiring on Oct 30. His kindness and reassurance made a huge difference in our lives.
Nancy! I am so excited to see you here – hello!
And wow, what a gift, especially in a time fraught with anxiety and stress. People are so beautiful sometimes, aren’t they?!
There is great joy in doing the small things, always. Beautiful post, Michelle!
Blessings!
Would hitting “like” on all my friends FB sites apply? Snicker? I love to let my friends know I read it and had enjoyment doing so, just a small participation in their life!
Oh Michelle…I am sorry to be late in commenting on this post. I have always believed in the card/letter-writing “ministry”, for that is what I believe it is.
Funny you should post this at this particular time. I have a precious niece who is, right now, going through deep waters. Just yesterday, I sent her a card trying to express to her that I will love her always, no matter what happens. And that I am here, if she wishes to write back, (we’ve been “pen friends” for 3 years), or if she needs to talk to someone. I’m praying she responds.
I have always sent cards and letters. It’s in my DNA. I guess I’m a co-supporter of Hallmark, right alongside your dear Mom. Thanks for this today–a sweet reminder that “small things done with love” can become great things in someone else’s life, precisely at the right time.
Love this message, but it finds me wanting.
I do send cards, and I try to send emails, text messages to those I know need a little lift.
I also pray.
Hugs.
“Great opportunities to help mankind seldom occur, but small ones surround us everyday.”