Some of you might remember my story of the necklace – the necklace I stole right out of a classmate’s desk when I was in the third grade. I never returned the necklace to its owner, and I never admitted to anyone that I stole it until I wrote about it on my blog, nearly thirty-five years later.
Two years ago on Easter Sunday afternoon I opened my in-box to discover an email from a former classmate. She’d come across my blog, read the story about the stolen necklace – her necklace, as it turned out – and wrote to tell me that she was, in fact, the girl.
Her tone was less-than-pleased, as you can imagine. I read her brief email three times, my stomach churning more with each word. And as I read, I realized I had never once considered her story in the three decades that had passed.
So wrapped up in my own guilt and spiritual angst, I never once considered how she must have felt the day she realized her necklace was gone, stolen by a classmate right out of her own desk. I never once imagined how she’d felt betrayed, targeted, isolated and scorned. And I never considered how she might feel should she read about the incident thirty-five years later – how it might open old wounds, tear open scars never entirely healed.
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I was reminded of that stolen necklace once again when I read the familiar story of Jacob and Esau this week. It’s hard for me to get past Jacob’s behavior in this story. It’s difficult to understand how God could bless such an obviously flawed and deceitful person. Until, that is, I remember my own story of deceit. Like me, I suspect Jacob never considered his father’s or brother’s feelings when he deceived them. I suspect he acted only for himself, never once considering the wounds he would leave behind in his wake.
The grace in this story comes later, years later, when Jacob repents and Esau unexpectedly forgives. Likewise, the grace in my own story of brokenness came years later too, when, on Easter Sunday, I finally repented and my classmate forgave.
After I received her initial email, I agonized for a few hours before I finally replied to my former classmate, apologizing not only for stealing her necklace, but also for wounding her. She graciously accepted my apology, noting that it was a long time ago. Apologies not necessary, she insisted. “I wish you peace, love and happiness for the rest of your life,” she wrote at the end of her last email. And I know it sounds silly because it happened forever ago, but I felt gratitude and relief when I read those words on my computer screen. Probably much like the gratitude and relief Jacob felt when his brother forgave him.
Every time I read the story of Jacob and Esau, I forget that God’s plan is much bigger than any I can ever envision. I forget that he is always working to bring everything together for good, no matter how bad, how ugly or how broken it all looks at the start. Jacob was prepared to receive his brother’s ire, but he received only forgiveness and love instead. I was prepared to suffer the consequences of my wrongdoing, but I received forgiveness and love instead. In both cases, God turned a bad decision into an unexpected and undeserved blessing. He turned grit into grace.
Question for Reflection:
Can you think of an experience in your own life in which God turned a bad decision into a blessing, grit into grace?
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Oh how I hurt for you and then rejoiced with you over the revelation of exposure and then forgiveness. This is an amazing story for the lady to discover who took her necklace after all this time.
I know, isn’t it, Hazel? Not a coincidence, I am sure.
I love this story! And for me–I find every day forgiveness an amazing blessing and privilege of being a part of a Christian family. I can always count on my family to forgive me when I ask for it. And there is a surprising sweetness to being reminded (pretty much daily) that we will always ask for forgiveness and give it. A daily observance of us cooperating with Him as He turns the grit into grace. This is something I treasure.
So true about our families, isn’t it, Amy. My kids always forgive me when I say I’m sorry, even when I’ve morphed into a Medusa mother at them. And I forgive them, too. So much grit…but so, so much more grace.
wow. what a story, Michelle. God has turned so many of my messes into mercy-moments. I am continually grateful and amazed at His generosity for all of the times I fumble. Forgiveness is a great gift we can both give and receive.
I love the way you put that, Kris – “Messes into mercy moments.” Amen, sister.
Michelle – I wrote my post last week & posted it earlier this morning. I only got around to read & link to yours just now. Needless to say, I am sitting here, on this side of the computer screen, tears streaming. I am grateful to have read this, for your transparency & for your faithfulness to bring the Word.
Blessings,
Joanne
Joanne, I LOVED your story of the $7.99 chicken – you had me laughing! Way to be honest and true, though, girl. You did the right thing in God’s eyes, no matter what that teen checkout boy said!
“I forget that God’s plan is much bigger than any I can ever envision. I forget that he is always working to bring everything together for good, no matter how bad, how ugly or how broken it all looks at the start.”
I love when God turns grit into grace. It happens to me everyday; I just don’t always see it. Thanks for sharing this story, Michelle. It made my stomach churn at first but so glad it ended with you getting the forgiveness email!
Man, me, too, Lisa – that was a rough Easter Sunday afternoon, I tell you! But I love when God writes a very happy ending – and really, doesn’t He always?
What a great message. I feel free just reading your post!
Wonderful story, Michelle. It is never too late to ask forgiveness. And always amazing when we receive it. I’m so glad you corresponded with your classsmate of so long ago, and patched things up. Such freedom for both of you!
I am reminded of a girl I picked on mercilessly in grade school. She was Dutch. I learned the motto, “Dutch ‘aint much” at the knee of my dear ‘ole Dad. And so, I was unkind to her most every day. I cannot count the times I’ve thought of her through the years, and wish I could find her…and apologize. “Mary-Anne, If you’re out there, I’m so very sorry I was such a bully toward you. Please forgive me.”
Thank you, Michelle.
I truly think the hardest one for me to forgive is myself. I rather think I would fit right in with the penance of carrying whips around to give myself a whack now and then. What a wonder is Grace, Forgiveness and Mercy.
Oh my word, me, too, Connie, me, too. I didn’t confess that stolen necklace, but I did more than enough penance in beating myself up for it.
A beautiful picture of God’s grace…such grace. And doesn’t grace give us so much freedom? For you and for the one who offers it.
i love that you found each other. and grace. and i have to remind myself that god is a tower, which means he sees oh you know, FAR. the farthest….
Until now, I have not fully grasped the wonderful workings of grace. I can think of one super-bad decision I made in the past (it’s my testimony, actually): having an affair and separating from my husband. But through this same sin, God brought me and our whole family, into His salvation and a whole new life (my husband’s forgiveness, acceptance, and love). The power of God’s amazing grace!
Just one incident? Ha! You know, I too, struggle with what Jacob did. It’s so easy get all hoity-toity about those people in the Old Testament until…God uses their story to show you your own, right?
Crazy how God works — that this girl found your blog 35 years later. If that doesn’t say that God cares about every part of our hearts and lives, I don’t know what does.
Aww. I love/hate this story —- that would have made me throw up.
It just shows that He’s in everything — even “old” things. Wow.
Michelle-thanks for sharing this personal story on your blog. “I never once considered how she felt…..” Lord- I am so guilty of that in so many ways. Show a pious face, but harm others with words and actions or lack of action. Bless you as The Lord leads you to share real stories from your life and as you help us to look at our faces in that mirror of God. May we be blessed when we hear from The Lord “you are the man”, accept the guilt and ask for forgiveness.
Donna
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