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Michelle DeRusha

Every Day Faith. Faith Every Day.

May 28, 2014 By Michelle

Learning to Live the Questions

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The necklace — a choker with a velvet strap and a single brilliant faux sapphire — sat within reach, right at the edge of the open desk. I wanted that necklace; I had to have it, the desire for it so strong it made my stomach clench. So while my third grade teacher bent low over my classmate’s shoulder, I quickly reached behind their backs, slid my fingers into the open desk and then slipped the velvet strand into the front pocket of my corduroys.

Regret rushed in almost instantly as the thrilling high of holding the treasure in my hand crashed into gut-wrenching fear. Stealing, I knew, was a ticket straight to hell. I’d broken one of the Ten Commandments, had committed a mortal sin, and there was only one way out of the hell fires for which I was bound: confession.

…I’m writing about doubt, unbelief, questions and hope for one of my favorite online venues, SheLoves Magazine, today. Join me over there? 

When a Spiritual Misfit Says Yes
When You Can't See Jesus in 3-D

Filed Under: doubt, questions, questions in faith Tagged With: faith and doubt, living the questopms, SheLoves Magazine

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For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a Triple Type A, “make it happen” (my dad’s favorite mantra) striver and achiever (I’m a 3 on the Enneagram, which tells you everything you need to know), but these days my striving looks more like sitting in silence on a park bench, my dog at my feet, as I slowly learn to let go of the false selves that have formed my identity for decades and lean toward uncovering who God created me to be.

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