Michelle DeRusha

Every Day Faith. Faith Every Day.

(in)courage

Better Together: How To Nurture a Cross-Cultural Friendship

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Better Together

A few weeks ago the good people at (in)courage asked Deidra Riggs to participate in their Better Together series, a conversation about what it really looks like in real time and in real life to love our neighbors as ourselves and to walk around in someone else’s shoes.

Deidra then turned around and asked me if I would be willing to join the Better Together conversation and talk a bit with her about our “cross-cultural friendship.” I didn’t hesitate to answer a resounding YES! This is a topic Deidra and I have talked about more than once, and I was eager to share some of our thoughts with a broader audience.

So we posted a question on Facebook — If you were to ask us a question about navigating and nurturing a cross-cultural friendship, what would you want to know? — and then together we addressed some of the great questions we received. The results of that conversation are over at (in)courage as part of their Better Together series. I’d love for you to pour yourself a warm cuppa, pull up a chair, and join us over there. 

When You Want a Media-Worthy Miracle

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MichelleDeRusha_NoahRose

I was out front, watering the garden that runs along the white picket fence, when I heard my son Noah yell. “Quick, Mommy! Quick! Come here! Hurry!”

His voice was urgent, pressing, so much so that I stopped what I was doing and quickly walked over to where he was crouched at the curb. I bent down next to him, concerned that something was the matter, but he just pointed into the air.

Floating on a gentle current along the tops of the phlox was a curious bug, a miniscule creature about a quarter the size of my pinkie nail. It looked to me like a thin shred of paper, the handmade kind – bumpy, lumpy, pasty paper with bits of flower petals and leaves rolled into it.

…I’m over at (in)courage again today, with part 2 of my guest post series on Spiritual Misfit. While you’re there, don’t forget to visit Monday’s post for a chance to win a copy of the book! See you over there…

Tell the Truth as You Understand It

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MichelleDeRusha_dragonfly

“So I’m halfway through your book,” she says, as we stand next to the coffee percolator and the table piled high with double chocolate muffins. We chat for a bit about my memoir, and initially I feel pleased, but a few minutes later, after she’s turned away to refill her Styrofoam cup, panic clenches deep in the pit of my stomach.

I’m struck by the awkwardness of the situation. After all, I am about to interview this woman for a ministry position at my church, and it’s clear she knows more about me – a lot more about me – than I do about her. Worse, though, I suddenly feel anxious and insecure.

Scenes from my book flash through my mind, like the one in which I launch a fist-full of crunched up Cheez-Its at my young son in a fit of pre-bedtime lunacy.

Or the scene in which I mercilessly judge another woman, seething with envy over the fact that she looks like Gwyneth Paltrow in her name-brand jeans and her perfectly coiffed hair while I, in my droopy-bum yoga pants and my pilly fleece sweatshirt, resemble an out-of-shape version of Richard Simmons.

…I’m super excited that Spiritual Misfit is being featured by (in)courage as a Recommended Read, and we’re doing a giveaway over there today! Come by (in)courage for the rest of the story…

We Need YOUR Story {the 2014 inRL Conference}

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As we inch closer to publication day for Spiritual Misfit, I’ve been hearing one question in particular. People are curious if I’ve always wanted to be a writer and if I’ve always wanted to write a book.

The answer is no.

The truth is, eight years ago when I trudged down to our basement office before dawn and put my fingers to the keyboard, I hadn’t a blessed idea a book was about to be born. In fact, I didn’t realize I was writing a book until about 75 pages in, when it suddenly occurred to me that I seemed to be writing an awful lot of material.

The first sentence of Spiritual Misfit
 was the first creative sentence I ever wrote. I’d worked as a business writer all of my professional life, but I’d never written anything on my own, on the side.

That’s how I know it was God behind this whole crazy journey. Because when you think about it, why else would a girl who didn’t believe in God and who never wrote a creative word on her own begin to write a book about God one mid-winter morning before dawn?

I may not have known what in the world I was doing back then, but let me tell you, I believe in the power of story now.

That story I wrote eight years ago brought me back to God – God used those words I typed in the early mornings and late at night to bring me back to him. It sounds a little cheesy, but sometimes I describe Spiritual Misfit as both my love letter to God and his love letter back to me. My understanding of his love and grace is woven right into that book.

That’s why I love this year’s (in)courage (in)RL theme: We Need YOUR Story.

Because story is powerful.

Story tells us we are not alone, that we aren’t “the only one.”

Story connects us — to God and to each other.

Story inspires us to find our own brave, to step out in courage and hope.

Story unites us with arms linked and hands grasped.

This year my friend Deidra and I will join 28 other women to talk about friendship, community and the power of story as part of the 2014 (in)RL Conference. We’ll focus on the “how” of story and community: what building community looks like in a practical sense, and how we can see God’s glory in and through our everyday life, relationships and stories. We’ll share our personal testimonies and stories of community — the messy and the beautiful and the beautifully messy.

Join us for the third annual (in)Real Life webcast conference, Friday and Saturday, April 25 and 26. Grab a girlfriend or two or ten, set out the snacks and plunk down on the couch to participate in some beautiful, compelling, inspiring conversation about community, friendship and the power of YOUR story.

Visit (in)courage for more information, the agenda, a description of video topics and to register (it’s free!). 

(in)ked: A Community for Writers {You’re Invited!}

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AN UPDATE: The (in)ked Writers Group has reached its maximum number of 50 members, so I am so sorry that we are unable to accept any more members. All of the (in)couragers groups are capped at 50 to ensure that the groups stay small enough to be manageable and conducive to conversation. However, the good news is that there are THREE additional writers’ groups offered, so please hop over to the Find a Friend page and check out the other great writers’ groups. Thanks!! 

 

Last year I hosted a group of women at my house for an (in)Courage in-real-life event. Some of the women I knew well. Some of the women I’d never met before.

Truthfully, I was a little nervous about the whole thing, and part of me regretted getting myself all involved in it. In fact, I’d awakened the night before at 3:30 a.m. in a panic.  Should I buy flavored creamer? Would I have to pray out loud? Would people notice how sprongy my couch is with the broken springs?

How would it work, I wondered, with such a disparate group of women – women who didn’t even know each other, who weren’t even in the same place in life? I worried about the fact that we were probably all at different spots on the spiritual spectrum. “What if it’s too Jesus-ey?” I worried. “What if it’s not Jesus-ey enough?”


In the end, it worked beautifully.

Sure, some of us had never met before. And it’s true, we were different, all of us at various life stages – married, single, divorced, empty nester, grandmother, young mother, working, stay-at-home, retired. And yeah, we were undoubtedly at various points on the spiritual spectrum, too. But despite all that, we laughed. We shared stories. We ate scones.

We connected. And it was a beautiful thing.

Fast-forward almost a year. I’m still connected with (in)RL, and this time I’m teaming up with my friend Kimberly Coyle to lead an online (in)Couragers Writing Group. It’s called (in)ked: A Community  for Writers (Kimberly came up with the super clever name!), and we want YOU to be a part of this!

If you’re coming over from (in)courage to find out more about the Writers’ Group, let me tell you a little bit about myself. I’m mom to bug-loving boys Noah and Rowan and a pet lizard named Frill, and wife to Brad, an English professor who reads Moby Dick for fun. I live in Nebraska, where we moved 11 years ago, and where I discovered the Great Plains, grasshoppers the size of Cornish Hens…and God. I’d been an unbeliever for 20 years or so, and my return to God was as much a surprise to me as it was to everyone else in my life.

My faith and my writing have been connected from day one. Back in 2006 I inexplicably began to write my faith story – literally the first sentence I wrote would turn out to be the first sentence of a memoir that would take me more than two years to write. I didn’t know it at the time, but God used writing to bring me back to him, and I’ve been wrestling with my faith on the page ever since.

This writing journey hasn’t turned out exactly like I’d envisioned. In short,  my hair turned grey, and I’ve thrown more tantrums and shed more tears than one might like in pursuing this dream called publishing. I’ve thought about quitting once or twice(okay, like  24 million times), suffered more rejections than I can count (including another writer’s rejection…but that’s a whole other story) and weathered every up and down you can imagine.

That’s why I LOVE the idea of this online writers’ community.

Writing can be a lonely endeavor. (in)ked is a community where we can connect: to celebrate each other’s successes, pray for each other’s opportunities, ask each other for advice and support one another when the inevitable rejections trickle in. We hope to create a place where we can talk craft and calling, and we want you to join in the conversation.

We want you regardless of where you are in this writing journey, whether you have three books with your name on the cover, or if you only refer to yourself as a writer in the quiet corners of your heart. Everyone is welcome, no matter which stage of the journey you’re at.

I met Kimberly last summer when we were roommates at the She Speaks Conference, and she is awesome. Not only is she a beautiful, eloquent and passionate writer, she is also super warm, hilarious and very real. Ten minutes after meeting her in person, I felt completely at ease – and this is saying A LOT, especially considering the fact that we were two perfect strangers hanging out in our pajamas within hours of meeting one another. I was rattled to the bone at She Speaks, and Kimberly cracked me up and helped me settle in and just be me, which was a huge gift.

So, what do you say? Will you join us to talk about writing and all its up and downs? I can’t promise Kimberly and I will have all the answers (or any, for that matter), but I can say with confidence that we’ll learn, we’ll connect in a meaningful way and we’ll eat virtual scones.

To learn more or sign up to join (in)ked, visit the (in)ked Facebook Group page. You can also find out about all sorts of other groups by visiting (in)courage.

If you want to sign up to join our writers’ group, please do so before March 1 – the groups are capped at 50 members. The (in)ked Writers Community runs from today (February 12) through April 26. We’ll mostly be hanging out at the private (in)ked Facebook page, so join there if you are interested.

*Note: I apologize to you men out there who are reading this and thinking it sounds good. (in)courage is a community for women, so (in)ked is open to women only.

Questions? Let me know in the comments or email me at [email protected]