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Michelle DeRusha

Every Day Faith. Faith Every Day.

the creative life

How to Rekindle Creativity as an Adult

May 30, 2018 By Michelle

I’ve been listening to a new-to-me podcast called Slow Home during my morning jogs, and this morning the hosts got me thinking about the importance of creativity – in particular, the act of creating not to produce something, but simply for the enjoyment of the creative process itself.

Toward the end of the episode one of the hosts quoted Albert Einstein, who once said, “Creativity is intelligence having fun,” and for the remainder of my run, I couldn’t stop mulling over the connection between fun, intelligence and creativity. I kind of liked the image of my stodgy, properly behaved brain loosening up, unpinning her hair, so to speak, and having a little party up there.

The truth is, though, creativity for the sake of being creative – “fun creativity” – does not come easily to me. As an Enneagram 3, I tend to be hyper-focused on producing and outcomes. And because my job as a writer is so tightly entwined with my creativity, I often find it hard to separate the two. The more I thought about it as I plodded toward home, the more I realized I don’t know how to be creative without production as the impetus. 

At one point in the episode the hosts suggested that those of us struggling to figure out how to be creative might consider reflecting on the creative endeavors we enjoyed as a kid.

Let me tell you, it nearly stopped me in my tracks to realize that I couldn’t remember doing anything creative in my youth. I colored in coloring books, always making sure to stay within the lines. I played with Barbies, rode my bike and read as much as I could. On a really crazy day, I constructed a blanket fort in the basement and then crawled inside to read with a flashlight.

I was about to give up entirely on the idea that I’d ever enjoyed any creative endeavors as a kid, when suddenly I remembered how much I had loved spending time outdoors.

When I was young my family owned a camper that we parked in a woodsy campground called Sun Valley (I’m not making that up). We essentially lived there all summer long, returning home only occasionally so my dad could mow the lawn (he was a teacher, so he had summers off) and my mother could catch up on laundry and bills.

To this day, the scent of citronella instantly whisks me back to the picnic table under the striped awning, the campfire snapping and popping, whip-poor-wills calling from the birch trees.

During the long, hot afternoons, while my mom read romance novels in her beach chair, Coppertoned legs outstretched, I swam in the  lake with my sister and our friends. We’d breaststroke to the float, hoist ourselves up the metal ladder, and sprawl on the splintered wood, warming our bodies brown in the sun.

Later, when my mother tuned the camper’s tiny black and white television to “The Phil Donahue Show” while she boiled hot dogs on the Coleman stove, I’d head to the stream, which for reasons that even then didn’t entirely make sense, we all called Gilligan’s Island.

There, in the dappled late afternoon light, we’d splash around in our bare feet, hunting for crayfish under slick rocks, plotting how to divert the flow of water with a network of hand-constructed channels and dams, and belting out “Put Another Nickel In” into sticks we pretended were microphones. What we made — our elaborate dams, our songs, the delicate fairy houses of twigs and flower petals — didn’t last. We simply enjoyed creating them in the moment and then left them behind when we were done to be enveloped by the rhythms of nature.

These outdoor experiences of my youth might not be considered “creative” in the traditional sense, but the more I think about it, the more I realize that’s exactly what they were. During the languid, seemingly endless days at Sun Valley, I followed my curiosity wherever it led. I immersed myself in the landscape. I discovered an endless array of intriguing flora and fauna – the plant in the boggy woods behind the camper that looked like lettuce but smelled a lot like skunk; the plump, flushed cup of the Lady’s Slipper; the insect, slim as the thinnest stick, that skittered across the surface of the water eddying dark and mysterious under the mossy bank.

Back then, I wasn’t creating to make or produce something. I was simply participating in the ongoing creation and flourishing of my true self.

I think back to my years at Sun Valley with great gratitude. I’m lucky to have had such an idyllic childhood, largely free from worries and cares. I recall that time with nostalgia, even with a bit of sadness, knowing that kind of creative freedom and exuberant living cannot be entirely rekindled.

Yet I’m also convinced that as adults, we need to pursue that kind of unbridled curiosity — to allow ourselves to be creative simply for the fun of it. I’m not exactly sure what “fun creativity” in nature might look for me now, as a 47-year-old mother of two teenage boys, working two jobs and living in the smallish city of Lincoln, Nebraska in the middle of the Great Plains. It probably won’t involve catching crayfish or singing a 1950s hit into a microphone stick. But I do know this: it would be worth my while to find out, not only for the sake of my professional writing life, but, even more importantly, for the wellbeing of my mind, body and soul.

So tell me…how are you creative as an adult? Like me, do you struggle with “fun creativity,” or have you found something you like to do or make that fills you with exuberant joy, just because? 

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Filed Under: curiosity, nature, writing Tagged With: creativity, creativity in nature, the creative life

Why I Said Yes to a Part-Time Job {or, Let’s Talk Real about the Creative Life}

April 26, 2017 By Michelle

When I left the traditional workplace five years ago, after ten years working part-time as a fundraising writer for Nebraska public television and radio, I never expected I would want to return to a “regular job.” But here’s something I’ve learned in five years of full-time writing: flexibility and an open mind are key to having a fulfilling, productive, sustainable creative life. If something’s not working, you have to be willing to admit it’s not working and have the courage to try something new.

As a Triple Type A planner, it’s been hard for me to live in the gray space of not knowing when my next project will turn up. Off and on over the last five years I’ve often been anxious about whether I would get enough freelance writing and editing assignments and whether I would land another book contract in order to be able to contribute financially to our household. I missed the stability of a steady, reliable paycheck (to say nothing of human interaction – turns out, the Beagle-Corgi and the Philodendron don’t quite cut it).

Five years ago, I also didn’t realize that a writer typically doesn’t get a book contract every year or so…nor should they (I know of a very small minority of writers who manage to do it, but the fact is, writing a book every year is nearly impossible). That said, I realized I had begun to rely on book advances as a part of my income, and the pressure to produce book after book was becoming increasingly burdensome.

Here’s the real deal, friends (at least the way I see it): unless you have a very large platform or have established yourself as a multi-book best-selling author, you are likely not going to be able to earn even a part-time living as an author of books without supplementing your income in a variety of creative ways — and even then, you might struggle. The truth is, even with three published books under my belt, several freelance book editing projects a year, a paid monthly column in my local newspaper, and a handful of paid articles every year, I was still barely eking out a very modest part-time income.

Please know, I don’t say this to deter you from pursuing your creative dream, whether it’s to be a writer or a musician or an artist or a crafter. We need to pursue our passions. I believe from the top of my head to the tips of my toes that creativity is imperative to the health of our souls.

All I’m saying is that you should pursue your passion alongside a healthy serving of reality. If you are looking to earn a living as an author, you better also have a strong entrepreneurial spirit and be willing to get creative with making the most of your skills in new and unique ways.

Honestly, I don’t have much of an entrepreneurial spirit. The idea of launching a series of web classes or an online membership community for writers or an I-don’t-even-know-what (see? not creative in that way) makes me want to shave my head, don a drapey orange robe and eat Godiva chocolate bunnies while chanting in Sanskrit. In other words, retreat as fast as I can into a monastic existence that also provides copious amounts of quality chocolate.

Alas, all this to say, I am thrilled to have accepted a part-time job as a writer for The Salvation Army Western Division! And despite the fact that I just dedicated the preceding seven  paragraphs to talking about money, money isn’t the only reason I am delighted with this new opportunity. I’ve been freelancing for The Salvation Army for a few months now and have enjoyed every moment of it.

Plus, ever since I wrote a chapter in 50 Women about Catherine Booth, co-founder with her husband William of The Salvation Army, I have had a tremendous respect for the work The Salvation Army does with the people who are most in need in our communities. It’s an honor and a privilege to work for an organization that for more than 150 years has been serving those society has deemed unworthy of support, respect, and love.

Add to that the fact that as I was perusing an old journal this week, I saw I had written a prayer a couple of years ago asking that I would find non-profit human services organization that would be a good fit for my skills. I’d forgotten all about that prayer, but God hadn’t. As God has fanned into flame my desires to serve others with my specific gifts, he has been moving me toward this point in my spiritual and vocational  journey all along. God is the best!

So that’s my big news. And just so we’re clear, I’ll still be writing here once a week or so, and I hope to continue to write books, God willing. Truth be told, I’m a little anxious about adding 20 hours of work to what already feels like a pretty full schedule, but as my agent Rachelle reminded me, I tend to be a person whose efficiency increases with my workload (thank you Triple Type A personality), so we’ll see. Something will inevitably have to give; time will tell what that something is.

Am I disappointed that I couldn’t make a viable part-time living as a full-time writer? I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t. But I’m also absolutely comfortable with and genuinely excited about this new phase of the journey.

The moral of the story? Pursue your passion with gusto, don’t be afraid to make mistakes (that’s the only way we really learn, right?), and know that there’s an infinite number of ways to make it all work. God’s in it, and he always, always has our best interests at heart.

Filed Under: work, writing Tagged With: the creative life

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For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a Triple Type A, “make it happen” (my dad’s favorite mantra) striver and achiever (I’m a 3 on the Enneagram, which tells you everything you need to know), but these days my striving looks more like sitting in silence on a park bench, my dog at my feet, as I slowly learn to let go of the false selves that have formed my identity for decades and lean toward uncovering who God created me to be.

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